Editorial page title
Forgiveness: thoughts requested!
Antoine Jaulmes
22 March 2008

There are many theories to explain human behaviour and History, but we are stuck with the same questions that the ancient Greeks grappled with when they wrote their tragedies. Why does fate strike the same people again and again? Why are maledictions passed on generation after generation?

Apart from the Bible – or the Quran, for that matter – when Adam eats the forbidden fruit, there are many stories of ‘original sin’ in mythology as well as in history. On a given day something terrible happens – Osiris is killed by Seth, Atreus and Thyestes kill their step-brother starting the long murderous feuds of the Atrides… and for several generations, if not for ever after, malediction lingers on. It seems to be the wisdom of nations that certain inhuman acts are the foundation of very long-lasting injustices.

History provides many examples. Just to name a few: the Church’s hate of the Jews which built up anti-Semitism with its many consequences; Napoleon’s endless wars which diverted revolutionary ideals into nationalism – a predatory ideology that is partly overcome only two centuries later, as we now enjoy the extension of the Schengen treaty and free movement through 24 European states for 400 million citizens; the Crémieux decree issued by the French government in 1870, which granted French citizenship to all Jewish inhabitants of Algeria, leaving Muslims out. What a terrible message coming from a supposedly secular republic. We still live with the consequences.

In all these instances, there is a treason of the deepest beliefs and values – something that shatters the sense of security and questions the identity of the victims; their reaction is a drive to survive and reassert themselves as worthy human beings entitled to their full dignity.

New injustices then appear when the victims eventually rally to defend themselves and in turn become aggressors. Zionism has set the Middle-East ablaze and many from the Arab world would now point at it as the ‘original sin’. The German pupil overtook his French master in terms of supremacist world view, and became the problem nation in Europe. Algeria, after fighting a bloody independence war, now seems unable to escape the malediction of violence and remains a victim of random bloodshed.

Many theories have been put forward to explain human behaviour and History. They come a long way, but we are sometimes stuck with the same questions that the ancient Greeks grappled with when they wrote their tragedies. Why does fate strike the same people again and again? Why are maledictions passed on generation after generation? Why is there nothing new under the sun?

Is there really? Or has humanity discovered a way to break the chains of hate? One element that gives me hope today is the realisation that forgiveness is relevant to international relations. Germany and France do not invade each other any longer because words of forgiveness were spoken and received. ‘I wanted to see your country destroyed, I am sorry’ were the simple words of French woman Irene Laure and many other German and French. Much in the same way, German-speaking Italian Tyrol was pacified after reaching the brink of civil war; Zimbabwe was peacefully returned to majority rule in spite of a military takeover ready to go; the most extreme rebellion of Burundi joined the government coalition after years of isolation.

Yet in view of the needs, it is an all too rare experience. How to initiate more forgiveness in our merciless world? Who will take the responsibility to ask for it, taking the risk of a deep change of attitude and of a commitment to combat cycles of more hostility or injustice?

And are we not at the moment committing new injustices which will ignite conflicts tomorrow? If we are honest, we cannot escape identifying risk areas where preventive action is needed.

If you have read this far, I have a hunch that you may already be taking action, thereby demonstrating that change can overcome fate, or that you may be eager to. In both cases, we are at Easter, a time when Christians celebrate forgiveness out of hate and new life out of death. What better opportunity could there be to reflect and share about these questions? (And if you happen to be an Orthodox Christian, there will be another opportunity in five weeks.)


Antoine Jaulmes is an engineer with PSA Peugeot Citroën in Paris. His wife is Dutch and and they are both involved in the work of IofC.



WHAT OTHERS SAY ABOUT THIS COMMENTARY:

Congratulations for this piece. Nothing new under the sun? Well, why not read a bit more, like the study 'On Apology' by psychiatrist Aaron Lazare from Boston. See this review: "Lazare, a gifted psychiatrist, distinguishes between genuine apologies and statements of sympathy ('I'm sorry for your loss') and pseudo-apologies of the kind often favored by politicians ('I'm sorry if you were offended by anything that was said').... The strength of this book rests in the stories of apologies that Lazare has collected from people, politics, literature and history."--Washington Post Book World

For more, go to www.oup.com/us/catalog/general/subject/Medicine/PsychiatryPsychology/?ci=0195173430&view=usa
Christoph Spreng, 23 March 2008

Growing up in a community where lateral violence and racism are an everyday experience combined with a community sense of powerlessness, I can see how the cycles of pain, anger and violence continue. Handling conflict with violence can become a norm and when you are not taught any healthy ways to heal or cope eventually you will either fight back or give up. Those who have the power are seen as the strong.

Even in our media, acts of war are seen as acts of strength where the "good" guys are out to get the "bad" guys. Even when there are no real good guys or bad guys to speak of - just people with different values and beliefs. The leaders who wage war rarely do this out of their desire to help humanity but out of greed and patriotic ego. I believe that the world has evolved further away from community, connection and spirituality. Even religions have been abused as they are used as a cloak of power versus peace.

But is it all lost? No. I believe there are thousands of people awakening and starting to question and reconnect with who they are. The hardest work one can do is work on healing themselves. Forgiveness is an act of a person with a strong spirit and a willingness to look within. Only then can acceptance and understanding work at changing the world.
Donita Large, 25 March 2008

Yes, there are many theories to explain human behaviour and history – but which are the helpful ones? The best answers are leading to healing. And often they include the one who answers as a part of the answer – by growing trust.

Healing needs diagnosis and medicine. So we need to understand the circle of hate and revenge. Not as an excuse. (In Germany we had a president of parliament who, in a speech, tried to understand the guilt of the most terrible years of our past. He was accused of excusing the unexcusable and had to resign.) Understanding helps not to repeat former mistakes and injuries.

A good help I found was written by Olga Botcharova: a report of her work on the Balkans after the war with members of different ethnics and religions. In her article "Implementation of Track Two Diplomacy" (Joe Montville) she described seven steps of the chain of hate and seven steps toward reconciliation.

The full article by Olga Botcharova can be found by:
www.humiliationstudies.org/documents/BotcharovaTrackTwoDiplomacyChapter.pdf

My conclusions:
MRA/IofC has shown a special potential to create hope and encourage steps toward reconciliation by
sharing experiences of change. We also need to understand the steps towards hate/revenge and toward
hope/forgiveness/peace. Pain is inevitable, but accepting suffering in some ways may transcend pain.
The values of our standards create special rooms of healing and growth:
1. Rooms for HONEST feelings help to express and leave behind fears, weakness, shame, anger…
2. LOVE creates an atmosphere of human warmth, understanding and acceptance. Here tears and grieving
develop a potential of healing.
3. PURIFICATION: Injured persons overcome shame and pain by accepting it as a bitter medicine for
themselves and against causing new pain again and again. Otherwise they may become brutalized and
inhuman
4. UNSELFISHNESS is not an end in itself, it means to be ready to accept a new challenge and requires
experiences of healing .
MY QUESTIONS
Anger is a very natural spontaneous reaction on aggression and injury. It contains an energy mostly used
in a negative, destructive way. How can this energy be used constructively? I am very interested to read
about experiences which may help to identify quick and slow steps on constructive ways.
Thomas Buehler, 26 March 2008
Thomas Buehler, 28 March 2008

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